The occasional rise and numerous falls of Adam Sandler

Because graphs are fun, I wanted to add a final piece to Hulk Hogan Week and make a chart of his movie ratings over the years. As it turns out, though, very little of his filmography has actually been seen enough to garner critical ratings (and it’s probably for the best, because the range would be 0 to 10%.) So I’ve decided to make a chart for someone different, often considered the patron saint of garbage movies: American funnyman Adam Sandler.

At the top of the list with an 86 is his cameo in Chris Rock’s Top Five, and my favorite director Paul Thomas Anderson’s Punch-Drunk Love follows at 79. From there, it’s not pretty. You can see in the 90s how he starts out very low and eventually works his way up to slightly higher fare, but there is no consistency here; it’s kind of remarkable how Sandler’s movies jump way up then crumble to the bottom almost like clockwork. The lowest, at a fine 0, is the recent Netflix exclusive The Ridiculous 6, which just came out, so maybe he has better stuff ahead of him if the trend continues.

 

Hulk Hogan’s worst acting roles

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Hulk Hogan has worn many hats throughout his career, all of which usually deserve quotation marks: “wrestler,” “musician,” “pasta mogul,” “television star” are among the most recognizable. But for some reason, he’s mostly forgotten as an actor despite appearing in terrible movies for kids across a span of decades.

But fear not–if you’re uninitiated with Hogan’s oeuvre, WhatCulture compiled a list a few years back of some of the many bad things he’s done on camera (thankfully, sex tape not included). My personal favorite of the bunch, Mr. Nanny, is well-represented–it’s basically the predecessor to Vin Diesel’s The Pacifier, but with more Home Alone infusion and a whole lot less to like earnestly. (Also, for some reason David Johansen of the New York Dolls plays the villain?) There’s plenty else to like there too though, so take a look.

Who is the worst actor of all time?

People are always debating about what the best things are, and for actors and actresses, it’s no different. Names like Daniel Day-Lewis, Marlon Brando, Meryl Streep and Katharine Hepburn are always tossed around as the highest of the high–but how about the lowest of the low?

This brilliant piece of WOAT-data journalism courtesy of Vox tries to settle the score once and for all using critic rating data and a few other markers to determine who is really, really bad at their jobs. Topping the male list are Rob Schneider and Adam Sandler, which is probably what everyone expected when they read my headline. For women, Jennifer Love Hewitt and Jessica Alba have the dishonor of starring in the worst movies.

There are some quirks in these lists–Nicolas Cage makes a surprising appearance–but on the whole this piece is a great read and worth checking out.

The most savage Batman v Superman reviews

With my own review of the film in mind, it might help to also see what the other side is saying. The Guardian has thankfully collected a bunch of some of the most vicious negative reviews out there so that you don’t have to look for them yourself. See what you think of their points and if mine stack up, and if you’ve seen the film, see if you agree or not!

WOAT Movie Review: Batman v. Superman: Dawn of Justice

2016 is going to be full of big superhero titles coming to screens everywhere, but one of the most anticipated for sure had to be Batman v. Superman: Dawn of Justice, a landmark release that features not just a guy in a cape or a guy in a bat costume, but both a guy in a cape and a guy in a bat costume. It has a tantalizing premise and is adapted from some pretty solid source material, so hopes for the Zack Snyder film have been pretty high since the project was announced.

But it turns out almost nobody likes it.

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A sequel to The Room?

Okay, so it’s a lot harder to stay away from talking about The Room than I originally thought. I don’t see any more posts for the immediate future but I really can’t miss the opportunity to plug the news about a sequel to the best worst-movie of all time, as reported by the Newswheel.

According to them, The Car might be the realization of Wiseau’s long-gestating project about a vampire king of Alcatraz who has a flying car–might be, anyways, if it were a real thing and not a fun April Fool’s joke. (Except that part about the Alcatraz-vampire-car movie is totally real, too.) A sequel to The Room doesn’t really make sense considering Tommy’s character commits graphic suicide at the end of it, too… but we can all dream. Who knows what Tommy is thinking of doing next?